pump up the volume

This Promised Everything.

Promised:
1. A Pump
2. Volume
3. Christian Slater

Everything:
1. Doppleganger of Winona Rider
2. Repeated message to "take down the system"
3. Fist-pumping parents in angry PTA meetings

Like Heathers without an ironic bite, like Empire Records without any revelry. This, as my brother noted, was like Rock 'n Roll High School if it had a denoument. Plus, there was no Joey Ramone.